Thursday, 6 February 2014

The Salad Dressing to Each Other’s Lettuce

As a friend of mine once said “lettuce provides the excuse to add delectable toppings.”  I love salads but in all honesty it is usually not the lettuce, let me re-phrase that, it is never the lettuce that is the main attraction.  Certainly one ingredient that makes a huge difference is the salad dressing.

One of the more popular combinations is oil and vinegar, often with herbs and other flavors mixed in.  For those of you who cook you know that oil and vinegar do not mix well, yet are an essential base ingredient for many dressings.  It is when you shake them up and the two liquids become one, that they produce a satisfying topping.

So it is with husbands and wives.  Gender differences, life experiences, and personality differences alone create an oil and vinegar situation.  Both oil and vinegar have uses in and of themselves, they don’t particularly need each other.  But when they become emulsified they create a unique blend that adds much flavor to an otherwise bland collection of greenery.  Not to insinuate that either you or your spouse are bland but if you are able to bring your unique God given gifts, talents, perspectives and personality together you produce a blending that can bring God considerable joy.

By the time I see couples in counseling they have been so negatively focused on their respective differences that they can’t begin to consider what they could accomplish if they would only combine their strengths.

I tend to be task oriented.  I love check lists and I like crossing things off of the list even more.  I tend to address the superficial, low hanging, easily identified fruit.  I like to think I multi-task well, though I must admit that when in the kitchen that is not always a wise trait to employ.  However, I couldn’t organize a desk drawer if you gave me a week.  I don’t cook without a recipe.  I do not like spending time on detail.  I get impatient with things, particularly those of the electronic variety.  My wife on the other hand is a fantastic organizer.  She, in my opinion, often overlooks the low hanging fruit but when she digs into a project she strips it to the bare bones and re-builds it from the ground up.  She is incredibly clever, she can figure out anything.  She reads books on topics that I can’t even pronounce.  She is fabulous at putting together great tasting concoctions without a recipe.  I don’t call a repairman I call Kathleen.  If she can’t handle the problem, then I call a repair person.

We truly complement one another and we believe that is one reason that God brought us together.  Can you make a similar list of how you and your spouse could or do complement one another?

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