Wednesday, 25 April 2012

Develop Some Common Interests

I’m convinced that if your spouse is also your best friend you are probably going to have a good marriage, at least a seven on a ten point scale.  One contributing factor is that you have at least some of the same interests.  Often this is what brings friends together.

This is not to be mistaken for what we claim to enjoy while we are dating.  Women who have never watched one snap of a pigskin sit glued to the TV because the guy she really likes is into football.  The guy who wouldn’t be caught dead shopping at the mall is willing to spend hours with his girl friend looking at women’s shoes.

If your marriage is seeming a little stale and/or you are not feeling as though you and your spouse are connecting look for some common interests.  If it is something you both do or have done in the past it is easy.  If however you have not discovered any common interests over the years, each of you make a list of things you think you would enjoy doing and/or learning.  It could be to learn a board game like Scrabble; to learn a foreign language; to take a cooking class; to learn to scuba dive; to go bungee jumping; to go hiking; etc.  Perhaps you share an interest in a particular topic and you could read a book and discuss it.

Again this should be something that you would mutually enjoy and not something that is particularly well suited for one of the partners.  So if one of you is ultra adventuresome and the other ultra conservative bungee jumping may not be a good option.

His mouth is sweetness itself; he is altogether lovely. This is my beloved, this is my friend, daughters of Jerusalem.
Song of Songs 5:15-16

The Bible’s great love story – the Song of Songs, acknowledges that these two were not only lovers they were friends.

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