Friday, 9 March 2012


Dr. Robert Paul is known for his work at the National Institute for Marriage, where they conduct four day intensive marriage counseling workshops for marriages that are all but over.  It is referred to as a “marriage emergency room.”  Dr. Paul writes,

Sadly for most of us, hopes and dreams eventually fade into responsibilities and routine.  Our day-to-day reality may not be all that bad, perhaps falling somewhere between ‘a little disappointing’ and ‘entirely unfulfilling.’  

Without hope, we atrophy and diminish. Without dreams, we are no longer inspired.

Many people, consciously or unconsciously, have their windows to inspiration locked tight or severely restricted by a lack of willingness.  A lack of faith in God’s goodness and faithfulness is often caused by doubt or woundedness.”

Could this possibly be what God had in mind when he created the institution of marriage?   In part I can assume your answer to that question is determined by what you believe about God.  If you believe that God is omniscient, omnipotent and omnipresent then you would have to conclude that God wants more for the institution of marriage than for it to be disappointing or unfulfilling.

God’s Word says that marriage is supposed to be a reflection of the relationship between Jesus and His bride.  Do words such as disappointing and entirely unfulfilling sound like words you would use to describe the relationship between Christ and the church?

Furthermore we are told in 1Cor.10:31 that whatever we do we are to do it to glorify God.  Somehow I don’t believe that a marriage that lacks hope or is deemed as unfulfilling would describe a marriage that would bring glory to God.

Psalm 100 tells us that God’s faithfulness continues through all generations.  Lamentations 3:23 tells us that God’s faithfulness is great.  So we can either assume that God’s Word is a lie or that He really is faithful.  And to believe in a God who by definition is not good seems incomprehensible.

So if you are among those who are disenchanted with your marriage, who are feeling unfulfilled and lack hope that your marriage can be any better, then I would ask you to offer your marriage up to the Lord in prayer.  Even though he knows what you are feeling, tell Him.  Ask Him to change your heart, to help you become the husband/wife He has called you to be, and ask Him to transform your marriage into one that would bring glory and honor to Him.  Ask Him to fill you with the joy and hope that you can expect when you sincerely take your woundedness to the Great Physician.



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