Friday, 2 September 2011

Is Your Spouse One of God's Tools?

I am not by nature an angry person. I do get visibly “upset” however when things don’t go the way I think are supposed to go or don’t work the way I think they are supposed to work. In those instances I might be upset with myself, an inanimate object or occasionally another person. To my chagrin I learned that when I behave like a four year old having a snit, my wife feels my anger splashing on to her. It is not directed at her, she has absolutely nothing to do with what has upset me but none the less she feels the impact. I wish I could say that I have gotten this under control – I wish I could but I can’t.

One evening, not too many weeks ago, my wife and I were talking about some lessons that I was learning from Scripture. These lessons did not particularly paint me in a good light unless you consider being prideful and self-centered positive qualities. It was a good natured conversation in which I was acknowledging these frailties. Then in the most kind, gentle, subtle way my wife asked me a seemingly innocent question. She said when you get upset because things are not going according to your plan who are you angry with? Yes she ended the sentence with a preposition. A puzzled look came over my face, a look with which she has become quite familiar. She said ever so sweetly, “Are you angry with God?” The point being that God could prevent any of these annoyances from happening. He could eliminate my frustrations with my computer, He could remove the clueless people from my life, and He could enable me to complete a mechanical task without grumbling and complaining about the moron who designed the object of my frustration. Okay, so who among us wants to admit that they are angry with God?

A Pruning Process
Our spouses can be one of God’s best tools in our sanctification process. The critique is obviously best received when it is delivered in such a loving way that we think we just received a compliment. We should encourage our mates to help us to become more Christ-like. When two people are so committed to one another that they can freely give and receive feedback it brings glory to God.

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