Friday, 28 January 2011

A Piece of the Puzzle

"Make this tabernacle and all its furnishings exactly like the pattern I will show you." Exodus 25:9

As a rule I find doing jigsaw puzzles relaxing but there are those frustrating times when you just can’t find the right piece or you keep trying to make pieces fit that don’t. Barbara Rainey of Family Life shared an interesting perspective in a recent posting on Moments to You.

"Many times in marriage, all we can see are the pieces. We see the romance part. We see the conflict part. We see the housekeeping part. We see the bill-paying part. We see the parenting part. But because we spend so much of our time focusing on the individual parts of our marriage, we don't always see them in the bigger picture our Designer had in mind .

But the pattern is there nonetheless, and it's contained in the package of God's Word.
I want you to be encouraged that the pattern for your marriage isn't something you were responsible for creating. It's not based on feelings that can be strong today and much different tomorrow. The biblical pattern and plan for your marriage was created in the mind of almighty God, whose wisdom is unrivaled and whose love for you is beyond all bounds.
If you keep putting the pieces where they belong, His pattern will start to show. His design will take its beautiful shape in the form of your marriage

So what does it mean to put the pieces where they belong? It could be trial and error, keep trying pieces and see if they fit. Or it could mean to look at the picture on the box, i.e. God’s Word and begin to assemble the pieces as He spells out in His Word. He wants more than anything for your marriage to glorify Him, for the completed puzzle to be a demonstration of his grace, mercy and love.

I want to thank Bethany for her comments of this past Wednesday. I want to thank her for her transparency and willingness to share her painful experience as she has sought God’s help in dealing with infidelity. Where on earth could this puzzle piece fit in a marriage meant to bring glory to God? It requires the faith to believe that all the right pieces are in the box.


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1 comment:

  1. I'm going to try this again ,and I hope this time it goes through. (I tried on the other post but it wouldn't allow it.)

    The day before my husband confessed the affair, he had gone through such an inner turmoil of grief and despair he couldn't handle it any more. For the last two years, he had been so depressed that he continually drank, and was almost always intoxicated- even in the daytime. But I wasn't aware of the extent of his drinking. Anyway, the day before he confessed, he was being drawn by God- he came home and he opened his Bible (I was in town at the time), and he looked up the word "repent" in the appendix...then he realized that what he must do, something he had avoided doing all of this time, was to repent.

    He said once he repented, he couldn't believe how free he felt. All of those burdens he had been carrying for so long, they were gone. He didn't feel them anymore. But he knew that he had not received forgiveness yet from the one he had hurt.

    The next day, he confessed to me. I went through so much agony. I thought i was going to die. I had always been so happy about the fact that my husband and I were each other's "only", and now, that purity and oneness that I believed we had all of these years (12) was gone. Just gone completely. I was devastated and could not eat for days. I kept telling him i forgave him, and I tried to be optimistic, but I kept thinking that I couldn't believe this had happened. I had never understood before this happened that my husband was lost. He had said a prayer and had been baptized months before we got married, but it was only years ago that he realized in his heart he had never had a heart change. It was only outward. He was able to maintain a pretense of being a Christian, but inside it was a lie.

    But the wonderful thing is that I believe with all of my heart that God has worked a miracle through my husband. I think that this happened to show God's glory! God has given me comfort and has taken away my pain. I liken my experience to a labor pain, where you go through intense agony and pain but then it is over, the result is something precious and beautiful.

    Every day since this happened (two months ago), my husband has read the Bible with me, and we have read inspirational material (including many of the books listed on your blog). We have prayed together (something he never did before). He has also been praying with the kids each night before bed, and his disciplining habits have changed completely. There are so many things that have changed, I can't begin to list them all. The Bible is not lying when it says "if any man be in Christ, he is a NEW creature...all old things have passed away, all things are become new."

    I can't tell you how many YEARS I have prayed that this would happen! God answered my prayer directly...it just wasn't in the way I thought it would be.

    A few weeks after he confessed, we renewed our vows. It was such a wonderful day.

    I have hope for our future now. I know our foundation is on a rock, and not sand. I know that my husband's love for me is from God, an unconditional love. He now appreciates me in ways he never would have before.

    I have forgiven both my husband and the woman he had the affair with. It has freed my soul from bitterness and despair. I am happy and content and know that God has a plan for our life together, and our children.

    By the way, God gave me the most beautiful gift the day that I forgave. I found out I was pregnant with my 5th child! :) All things work together for the good, to those who love God.

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