Tuesday, 28 December 2010

Can Self-Help Marriage Resources be Beneficial

Are you willing to change whether or not your husband/wife changes? The answer to that question will determine whether or not DVDs, audio tapes, books or blogs can be of any lasting benefit.

Paul Tripp
The all too typical marriage counseling session starts with one or both parties coming to the session begrudgingly. The only reason they have consented to come is in the hopes that the counselor can change their spouse. The counselor is incapable of changing anyone. The individual must have the motivation to change.

It is possible that if one spouse changes the other “might” sense that things are different and may come around to making necessary changes. As husbands and wives the Bible commands us to respond to our husbands/wives in specific ways whether or not our spouse fulfills their covenantal obligation.

1Peter 3:1-2 serves as a reminder that even if just one spouse is determined to be obedient to God it can affect the marriage. “ Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.” The same concept applies to husbands, they too can win their wives over by loving them as much as they love themselves.

So if you and/or your spouse is willing to change, in order to have a marriage that glorifies God then there are some good products on the market. There are three DVDs I’d recommend: “iMarriage” and/or “Staying in Love” by Andy Stanley; and “What Did You Expect” by Paul Tripp.

Andy Stanley
There are four books that make the top of my list. They are Paul Tripp’s What Did You Expect; Dave Harvey’s When Sinners Say I Do; Larry Crabb’s The Marriage Builder; and Gary and Betsy Ricucci’s Love That Lasts: When Marriage Meets Grace.

The only audio tape that I have heard recently that I would recommend is a 17 year old series done by Tim Keller, Pastor of Redeemer in New York.

If you have any recommendations that I can add to my list I’d love to review them.